it’s okay!

  • weker01@sh.itjust.works
    6·
    6 hours ago

    So presenting masculine is not attractive?

    I dunno why but I’m somehow bothered by the post on an emotional level. I do not want to accuse anybody, it’s primarily my own issue of course.

    The first thing I thought of was transgender men getting told to present feminine. I think nobody should be told how they should dress.

    I know it’s a meme and I am taking this a bit too seriously.

    Anyways skirts are cool and can be cute and feminine like in the op or cool and masculine like a kilt. It’s a very versatile garment everybody could wear more often.

    • homura1650@lemmy.world
      4·
      4 hours ago

      I think of this as analogous to the movement to get women to wear pants. It’s not that we wanted them to present as masculine; it’s that we wanted pants to stop being masculine and start being just clothes. Basically all masculine coded attire became androgynous, but almost no feminine code attire did.

      It’s not like skirts are inherently feminine either. There are plenty of examples across cultures and time of it being perfectly normal for men to wear them.

    • not_IO@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOPEnglish
      3·
      5 hours ago

      calling skirts + crop top attractive is not the same as calling only that attractive. i hope this helps you make peace with this post

  • djsoren19@yiffit.net
    35·
    19 hours ago

    Need more places that sell crop tops and skirts in men’s sizes :( most of the places that do are selling fetishwear that’s kinda poor quality. Also, I personally hate ordering things online, and prefer being able to try clothes on in a store before I buy them, but that is very heavily discouraged for people who look masc.

    Edit: Just so other femboys know, there is one brick and mortar store you can absolutely go to; your local queer thriftstore! If you don’t have a local queer thriftstore…idk man that’s a sign to move in the current political climate. My post is more just saying we need more.

    • homura1650@lemmy.world
      2·
      4 hours ago

      Women’s skirts work just fine for men. You just need to translate between sizing scale, which is not that difficult (although it is annoying unless you are in person and can actually try things on).

      Crop tops are much more difficult to buy, as a lot of those really look bad if you don’t have breasts.

    • Anivia@feddit.org
      2·
      5 hours ago

      Sewing machines are cheap and tailoring is surprisingly easy to learn. I have a very uncommon physique so pretty much nothing from a store fits me, tailoring my own clothes has been a big boost to my looks, and towards clothes feeling comfortable

    • Purox@feddit.org
      3·
      14 hours ago

      I (AMAB) usually go into the women’s section to buy crop tops and skirts. While being a European S, I need something like L or XL in the women’s section. So my advice would be to just browse the women’s section and add two sizes to your regular size.

      • Valmond@lemmy.world
        3·
        13 hours ago

        I’m 6"6 and can’t even find male gear my size. I’m living off of imagining people like you. Cheers!

    • CreateProblems@corndog.socialEnglish
      13·
      20 hours ago

      So I’m a woman who loves shopping. But I’m a very short woman and I prefer to shop from the petite section - for most stores, petites are only offered online, if they’re offered at all

      So I do a LOT of online shopping and returning. I would also prefer to be able to try things on in stores before purchasing, but a lot of times I literally don’t have that option. So essentially I try stuff in the privacy of my own home. I prefer to shop online from stores in my area and then return in-person, but a lot of places offer free mail returns too.

      Point is, if you’re returning women’s clothes to a store, no one needs to know they were ordered for you. Maybe you’re shopping for your wife, maybe she’s disabled so she can’t get out and shop for herself, or maybe you just love buying her presents. Nothing is stopping you from lying to cashiers if they asked - but usually it’s just “was anything wrong with the item” and you just say “no it just didn’t work out/didn’t fit her/I ordered two sizes and she’s keeping the one that fits.”

      The best stores will list either garment measurements or suggested physical measurements for the sizes they offer. If you know your own measurements, this should help you make informed decisions until you get to know your sizes at various brands (…and even then, it will still vary widely! 😏)

      Looking at women’s plus size options may show you options that are more accommodating of broader shoulders, etc.

      • angrystego@lemmy.world
        7·
        12 hours ago

        Now I imagine being a man pretending to be shopping for my wife, saying it just didn’t fit her, while the cashier is looking with suspition at the skirt I’m wearing.

      • djsoren19@yiffit.net
        6·
        19 hours ago

        Oh don’t get me wrong, I know my sizes and have places to shop online. Femboy apparel is also a rapdily growing market, and I try to keep fresh with new sites.

        I’m just a weird romantic. I like the nostalgic idea of going to a mall with friends, trying on some clothes, and buying maybe one thing. There’s a lot more issues with buying things physically in general now, beyond just my niche. Finding a mall that doesn’t scream “beached whale” is tough nowadays, so it’s just longing for a simpler time.

        I’m also kinda an asshole speaking from a place of privilege, because I live in a place large enough to have a queer district where I can thrift. That’s basically Femboy Aeropostale. I just think it would be cool if there was a chain that catered to femme attire for men.

  • DerArzt@lemmy.world
    791·
    1 day ago

    Skirts yes, crop tops… Listen I know me and this gut was made for balancing a pint of Häagen-Dazs while on the couch, not crop tops.

  • yuri@pawb.social
    14·
    1 day ago

    skirts are some of the most efficient and comfortable clothes and it’s honestly bullshit i can’t wear them without being called slurs

    • Vox@lemmy.world
      13·
      1 day ago

      Wore mine down in Texas a few months ago, albeit it was to the rennaissance festival. Got some weird stares at the stops on the way though haha

    • caboose2006@lemm.eeEnglish
      71·
      1 day ago

      I took a DNA test and found out I’m mostly Scottish (family always said English and Polish) so maybe I will too.

    • yuri@pawb.social
      12·
      1 day ago

      there are folks who would sexually objectify your gut, don’t even play with me dog

  • TheAlbatross@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    593·
    1 day ago

    Let’s get some shit out of the way here.

    1. your chub looks great in a crop top, I swear. Start believing it, others do.

    2. your chest/belly hair looks great too

    Alright, with that business out of the way, proceed.

      • AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.netEnglish
        7·
        21 hours ago

        Something that helped me to feel more comfortable wearing crop tops was when a friend was complaining about her mum being iffy about my friend wearing crop tops; “Yeah, I get it, I’m chubby! <Grabs her stomach rolls> People can see that regardless of if I wear a crop top. Anyone who would think I look gross in a crop top already think that of me no matter what I wear, so I don’t care about dressing up for them”.

        This helped me to realise that because of my misgivings about my body, I tended to swamp myself in clothes that I hated, making myself look and feel worse. People being assholes can make it scarier to dress in ways that make us happy, but I can guarantee you that there are people who would find your body in a crop top to be distractingly hot/pretty.