You can swear on here. Stop censoring memes, it’s fucking dumb.

The whole thing is dumb if you accept a premise of “infinite monkeys”. An infinite number of monkeys will type the works of shakespeare immediately, because an infinite number of them will start with the very first key they hit and continue until the end. (So it’ll be complete exactly as fast as a monkey can type it, typing as fast as simianly possible, with no mistakes.) You don’t even need the infinite time.

It only becomes interesting if you look at the finite scenarios.

And BTW, the lifespan of the universe is finite due to the eventual decay of all matter, including the monkeys and the typewriters. There’s no infinite time.

It could have been worse, they were still charging up the THIS ROBOT IS TRAINED TO SMASH JIMMY’S DICK

I don’t think I need the context to understand this one.

bonus

I dust all my belongings and garments with it. Keeps me invisible to them.

The missing words are “shitty” and “fucking”, btw. I feel like we’re getting crap posts like this from bots that aren’t willing to tailor their posts for places where naughty words are allowed. Or reposts of bots’ output. Either way, I’m tired of it.

I’m mostly just impressed at whoever came up with a plausible-looking and fairly professional icon for it.

Admittedly the image quality is “this meme first appeared in a dirty magazine in 1986 and has been re-compressed twice a year since the internet was invented”, but there are falling lines above the cucumber, and a little puff of smoke where it hits the ground. It’s depicted as falling out of a tree.

A cucumber tree? Sir, this is a science community.

I think I’ve explained this too many times to do it again, but: teleportation doesn’t have to be “destroy and reconstitute” any more than going through a door necessitates killing you and reconstituting you on the other side of the door. The key is establishing continuity of your mind across the intervening space, which is mostly an engineering problem.

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You can’t convince people to do their job with logic when they just don’t want to do their job. After minorities, the thing cops hate most is doing their job.