I’ve lost my trash can, I know it’s not in my neighbor’s yard, but I don’t care because there is a goddamn MAGA sign in his yard and I wanna talk about what a piece of shit he is.

Wait, so if I drive fast enough I get a nice picnic meal?!?!

So I believe in aliens only in a statistical sense. There is a lot of space out there so SOMETHING has to be elsewhere. But those same stats tell me that the odds of it being intelligent is low, intelligent enough to contact us very low, existing at the same time as us (since we are a blip in the history of the universe) astronomically low and having the ability, or desire, to travel to us hilariously, laughably, insanely low.

I don’t think people who say aliens have been to earth are serious people. Sorry.

That being a “nice guy” isn’t a selling point, it’s the bare fucking minimum.

Salt.

• Nearly every recipe uses it
• infinite shelf life (durable)
• cheap as heck.

Okay, so I like bummer movies.

The Worst Person in the World

Might be my new favorite. Tells the story of a womans life over the course of several years. I adore this format where you can see realistic problems unfold, how relationships were doomed from the start and how others can be repaired with time. I’m sure there are people who would say it’s boring and nothing major happens. But, isn’t that life? We all create our own drama.

I don’t think she is the worst person in the world. But I understand what she might think that of herself.

Club Zero

A slow burn horror about toxic flawed faith in extreme diet culture. Did you know that you don’t ACTUALLY need to eat? Companies just TELL you that to sell you more food. It takes legitimate criticism of consumerism well past what I thought was extreme. Fantastic yet tragically plausible.

August: Osage County

Lots of big names doing A+ performances, a brutal story of a strained dysfunctional family finally breaking when their father disappears. When your parents do nothing but sow discord and cruelty they’ll only reap chaos and heartbreak. The abject cruelty is hard to stomach at points, but it fosters the payoff as the family learns to stand up for themselves.

Which is totally understandable and justifiable, even if there was no sensitive info on this particular call. Zero tolerance is the reasonable stance, not trying to criticize the firing. Just sorta curious why anyone would bother to record and post it in the first place. Like, wtf were they even thinking?

Was the call noteworthy in someway? Like a prank or something? Or was management just worried about some breach of privacy?

Glory to the white house by putting a black woman in it!