i don’t really need advice yet, it’s just a question. a girl im friends with acts really odd. we are friends, and we used to talk a lot, but then she started getting quieter, making less eye contact.
she also started being tenser/snippy at times.
when she’s not snippy, she’s just very quiet, which is most of the time. sometimes she’ll scoot over next to me but then scoot away, or act like she wants to sit by me but then goes away.
she doesn’t seem to be acting rude at all or mad at me. she will be nice, like smiling and waving and saying “hello”, or energetic when she can respond over text, so i don’t believe i’ve done anything to hurt her, but it’s just been really odd. what, from your experience, make a friend start acting this way? (especially girl because idk about guy friend behaviors)
most of the time, she acts normal, and i appreciate our friendship, and she seems to not hate me or anything like i said
update: i asked bc i was curious abt her behavior as friends, not just wondering if she liked me or anything even if that’s the impression some of y’all get 😭
How confident are you that she also sees things as ‘just friends’?
she supposedly likes someone else that she broke up w 2 yrs ago, unless she likes two ppl at once
ig not all ppl are openly flirty when they feel this way but still. i did act avoidant towards my crushes.
if she didn’t see things as just friends, it might explain a lot better, but im not confident, i just assume no
Liking multiple people at once is super common. The love triangle is a trope for a reason.
If you don’t like her then don’t worry about it (other than to maybe pay attention to how you’re acting around her and avoid flirting unintentionally) but if you’re interested in her, maybe try pursuing that? Flirt with her a bit and see if she reciprocates. If she likes you, there’s a good chance she’s been flirting with you and you’ve just been oblivious.
If you’re too shy to intentionally flirt, you could ask her outright, but it’d probably be better to ask her something that hints at your interest, like “I like this girl but I can’t tell if she’s into me - what sorts of signs should I be looking for?” Should be pretty obvious what you’re both saying and asking.
If she’s interested but shy and insecure, this could lead her into a spiral of worry and despair. Better to just say “I really like you” and see how she reacts.
That’s worth considering, but it also needs to be weighed against possibly impacting their friendship if she’s not interested. I also wouldn’t recommend saying he “really likes her” if he doesn’t already like her a lot that way, but even just “I like you” would work just as well.